When Trios Collide
by Sea MoonDragon
Summary: Team 7 recieve a totally new kind of mission to protect Harry Potter from Voldemort at Hogwarts! What kind of trouble will Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura get into when they meet Harry, Ron, and Hermione? ON HIATUS FOREVER, being redone by SlytherinPrincessVu
1. Enter Team 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or Harry Potter. Nope.

Chapter 1-

"Why are we even here, anyway?"

Everything was damp, dismal, and grey on the grounds of Hogwarts, except for Sakura's pink hair and Naruto's-well, all of Naruto.

Sakura gave Naruto a dirty look. "We need to protect Potter Harry from some crazy snake man. It's a mission."

"You don't by any chance mean Sasuke?" Naruto grumbled.

"Now, calm down. We've got to make a good impression on Dumbledore-sama." Said Kakashi.

Just then, a sallow, pale, greasy looking person with black robes strode out, presumably to greet Team 7.

"You are the Konoha…er, ninjas, correct?" the person sneered.

"Yes. And you are?" Kakashi said coolly.

Team 7 looked at each other in surprise, except for Sasuke, who showed no emotion whatsoever.

When had Kakashi-sensei learned to speak English that well?

"Professor Severus Snape, head of Slytherin and Potions master." Snape drawled.

"What's Slytherin?" Naruto blurted out.

"Ah, just like our Mr. Potter. Doesn't know a ghost from a ghoul." sneered Snape.

"Ghost? Ghoul?" Naruto asked.

"Baka." Sasuke said.

"Didn't you do the reading?" Sakura demanded.

Kakashi shook his head. "Please let us in, then." He said tiredly.

The five walked through the Grand Doors. When they stopped, they were in a chamber with a bunch of little kids all huddled together and staring at them with big eyes, most of them looking at Sakura.

"Severus," Professor McGonagall said, slightly surprised, "Who are these…people?"

"Potter's bodyguards. They are to be sorted in to the houses, in order to blend in with the students. However, their classes will all be with the Potter boy."

Professor McGonagall simply nodded and motioned for Team 7 to follow the huddled group of children.

"Err… are you the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?" McGonagall asked Kakashi nervously.

"Yes. Hatake Kakashi is my name." Kakashi answered smoothly.

"Alright, Hatake-" McGonagall started.

"Ano, obaachan, in Japan last names go first." Naruto blurted out for the second time.

"Naruto!" Sakura hissed.

"Excuse me." McGonagall said, embarrassed. "Kakashi, can you go out in front of the school and let Albus introduce yourself to the school?"

Kakashi nodded and walked off quickly.

"Now, as for you three, I will see that you are put in the appropriate houses. Your names are?" McGonagall said, quickly adopting her strict tone.

"Haruno Sakura."

"Uchiha Sasuke."

"Uzumaki Naruto!"

"OK, Ha- er, Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto, right?"

"Hai!" Team 7 said in unison.

A confused McGonagall led them through the towering doors into the Great Hall, where Professor Dumbledore was making his annual speech.

Sakura was sorted into Ravenclaw, Naruto into Gryffindor, and Sasuke into Slytherin. There were quiet rumors about them circulating through the houses and soon everyone knew about the three strange foreigners, and that one didn't even know what a ghost was!

Once the three were sorted, they all proceeded to sit at a table.

"Hold on!" a boy with red hair and freckles said, "You're supposed to sit with your houses!"

Naruto sat down. "I guess I sit here." he shrugged.

"Wait," Sakura hesitated, "shouldn't we find Potter-san?"

"You mean Harry Potter?" the boy with red freckles stood up.

"No, Potter Harry." Naruto stood up too.

"Hey Ron, what's up?" a boy with extremely messy dark hair and glasses asked, walking with another Gryffindor- a bushy brown haired girl.

"They want to know where you are." Ron said agitatedly.

"Excuse me, but are you Potter Harry?" Sakura asked politely.

"Er, yes." Harry said, a little freaked out that the foreigners knew who he was. They weren't all that bad, though, especially the girl with pink hair. At least they weren't like Malfoy.

"We're supposed to protect you," Sakura said, "From some crazy evil snake guy."

Ron laughed. "Voldemort?"

"Sure, whatever." Naruto said, picking up a piece of bread from the table.

"Hey, can you make ramen out of thin air, too?" he asked.

"Ramen?" Ron asked.

Hermione jumped in. "Ramen is a popular type of noodles in Japan, known as Nippon."

"O-K... I understood about 1/4 of that." Ron said.

"Gryffindors!" Professor Flitwick exclaimed, "Please-oh, Harry, Ron, Hermione! You are welcoming the foreigners! Would you please go to your individual common rooms, however, to do that?

"Wait, we're not sleeping together?" Naruto asked.

"No, not if you're in different houses." Harry replied.

Sasuke pulled them aside. "This house thing is just a disadvantage. Our movements are limited with this system!" he hissed.

Sakura shrugged. "I guess it'll help us fit in. After all, everyone already knows we're foreigners. Why let them guess we're actually here to protect Potter-san?"

Naruto snickered. "It's already too late for you, Sakura." he said, motioning toward her 'unusual' pink hair.

"Shut up, baka!"

"Naruto, you're responsible for Potter-san. We'll see you tomorrow." Sasuke said.

He started to walk away. Ron then saw that Sasuke was a Slytherin. He was suprised at first that the blond boy and the girl were friends with him, and then looked suspiciously toward Sasuke.

"Oy! Duck-head!" Ron exclaimed angrily, "Why didn't you tell us you're in Slytherin?!"

Sasuke slowly turned. His eyes were red with Sharingan. "I am not a 'duck-head'. And just because I am in your school does not mean I have to report to you. Got it?" he said slowly.

"Got it!" Ron squeaked as Sasuke strode off.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Please R&R! I hope you liked it so far... I wrote a lot more than I usually do for a chapter... hope I didn't bore you! -Sea


	2. The Sorting Hat

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Naruto.

Thanks for the Reviews!

Earthlight: Thank you so much! You're my first reviewer, too.

Kunoichi Flame Master: Thanks for staying with me! I know this idea isn't original, but I hope I can make it different from the others!

Manialoll stand on chakra: Thank you! There _might_ be pairings, but if there is, it won't be just one, but lots, so I can experiment and make people happy!

Kagekitsune49: I'm flattered! Yes, Hermione is really smart, as always. Like I said just above, I might do pairings, but not do just one. That's an interesting idea… I might try one of those crossover pairings… What year does it take place? It's after book 4, but before book 6. Just pretend there's a book 5 and ½. There's no definite year.

Hyrulehalfbreed: I will:) I'm glad you like it!

Mama San Sasori: Thank you! Yay! I'm almost perfect:)

Jing Rong: Arigatou! (lol, I'm running out of ways to say thanks)

Sorry for the lateness! I would have gotten it earlier, but I was out of ideas, then too lazy to type, then I couldn't find my file! Yes, I'm full of excuses.

BTW, please give me ideas! I'm totally out, and the only reason I'm typing this is because you dedicated (if few) people give me reviews and faves!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows was sooooooo awesome!

Chapter 2

The Gryffindor Common Room was abuzz with curiosity as the blond foreigner strode in with a grin plastered to his face.

"Hey Potter-san!" Naruto said enthusiastically as he sat down next to Harry and Ron.

Ron twitched a bit. He still had the image of those freaky red eyes burned into his mind…

"Why do you keep hanging around us?" he demanded, looking at Naruto strangely.

I told you, I'm supposed to protect your buddy, Potter-san," Naruto replied, as he peeked over Hermione's shoulder to see what she was reading.

Harry was really weirded out. First, the crazy smiling 'ninja' was about as old as he was, yet he couldn't even hold a wand properly! Second of all, he hung out with a pink-haired Ravenclaw and an emotionless Slytherin. Third of all, the foreigners were supposed to protect him! More like he should protect the 'ninjas'…

Harry snorted.

"So what _can_ ninjas do anyway?" Hermione asked curiously.

"Well, we can do..." suddenly Naruto grinned mischievously.

"What?" Ron asked cautiously.

"Never mind." Naruto dismissed, the smile never sliding off his face.

'It' could wait until breakfast in the Great Hall.

The three Gryffindors were starting to seriously think that the foreigners, or at least one of them, were any different than Muggles.

"So, _can_ you do anything?"

"Sure! Like… Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" Naruto shouted, grinning wildly.

He was going to show these people what he could do, and he was going to enjoy it.

Three dozen clones of himself appeared in a poof of white smoke, all yelling "Dattebayo!"

Hermione, Harry, and Ron all stared in disbelief. "That's… not… possible!" Hermione croaked. "I've read all the books about cloning, and it's not possible to make a fully functional copy of yourself, let alone 36!"

Ron and Harry looked at each other. These ninjas could do some cool things… perfect for torturing Malfoy, unless he had already recruited the foreigner with the chicken hair.

"So… can you do anything… like, I dunno, change your appearance?"

Before Naruto could answer, the sound of footsteps outside the Gryffindor Common Room could be heard and were getting closer and closer.

"Quick! Hide! I don't want anyone to know you can do that!" Ron warned.

But in a poof of white smoke, Naruto had already disappeared.

"Umm… where is he?" Harry asked, looking around confusedly.

"Excuse me, Mr. Potter. But who might 'he' be?" a stern voice said crisply.

"Oh! Er… um… Neville! He disappeared somewhere!" Harry said hastily.

A slightly porky brown haired stuck his head toward the other Gryffindors from behind a large, overstuffed red chair. "Hey! I'm right here!"

"He means the Gryffindor foreigner." Hermione said quickly, looking at Harry and Ron with narrowed eyes.

"Well, for any matter, there is something important that he must know." Professor McGonagall said briskly.

* * *

As Sakura watched the two boys head in different directions, she realized she had no idea of where to go next. The Great Hall was filled with people rushing out of the doors, but she had no idea of who to ask. 

"Ano… excuse me?" she asked softly to a girl that looked about her height. "Do you know where Ravenclaws are supposed to go?"

The girl looked at her with utter repulsiveness. "Why don't you ask someone who's freakish like you, big headed _forehead girl._" She said rudely, looking like she was wondering why Sakura was even talking to her.

The blossom-haired girl's eyes went rigid. Her whole body went stiff. "NOBODY INSULTS THE FOREHEAD!!" she screeched, and started collecting chakra in her fist, as the petrified girl watched with a very pale face.

* * *

Professor Sprout led a disheartened pink-haired girl toward the Charms classroom, patting Sakura kindly on the back. "Now, dear girl, I know she insulted you, but you can't simply punch somebody's face in. You may not have known this, being a foreigner, but it will have to end up in a detention." She said soothingly. 

Sakura just let out a small moan. She… she couldn't face Sasuke-kun and Naruto after this! They would be so disappointed with her… and Sasuke would think she was a loser!

_She had lost her bet with Naruto on who would get a detention first!_

The petal haired girl shuddered…

_"Hey, Sakura-chan!" Naruto said excitedly, "Look at this!"_

_Sakura and Sasuke both looked up, annoyed. "What is it?"_

_Naruto held up his book, __So, You're Going to Hogwarts to Protect the Chosen One?__ In it, there was a student polishing a stack of golden, gleaming trophies, medals, and other shiny things. Above it said 'DETENTION. Avoid getting this, as you are not allowed to use magic in the task. However, you may be able to use your ninja skills, so, if this is the case you should get detention once in a while in order to connect with the Chosen One.'_

_He snickered. "Awesome! Now I can get in all the trouble I want!"_

_Sakura sighed. "Naruto, I sincerely think if anyone is going to get in trouble, it would be you anyway."_

_"You wanna bet?"_

_Sakura thought. She would probably win, anyway. "Sure. What's your most prized possession?"_

_"Hmm… my ramen… or my forehead protector!"_

_"OK… mine's is…"_

_Sakura looked around quickly to make sure they were alone._

_"My…__diary__." she whispered_

The cherry haired girl trudged toward the Ravenclaw Common Room, directed there by Professor Flitwick. When she reached the aging door, Sakura reached a hand out and knocked lightly. The eagle doorknob opened its beak with a creak, and asked in a melodious voice, "Would you need to inform the Ministry of Magic of a decision to become an animagus?"

"Er... yes?" She guessed.

"Correct," it said lightly, and the door swung open.

The large, oval shaped room was filled with students in black robes and dark blue ties. Sakura had already changed into her robes, too. She sat down cautiously on a plushy blue couch, next to a dreamy looking girl that was staring at the fire place. Suddenly, the white-blonde girl started waving her arms around her head furiously, as if trying to shoo away a million bugs at one time.

Sakura raised her eyebrows. Was this supposed to be some magical spell ritual or something?

As quickly as the girl started, she stopped and closed her eyes. "Be careful," she said with her eyelids down, "there's a Wrackspurt floating around in here."

Sakura raised her eyebrows again. A _what?_ She had never heard of those before.

"What are those? I'm new here, I'm sorry I don't know." Sakura said, trying to be polite.

The dreamy, vague girl opened her eyes. Sakura sat there awkwardly, not knowing where to look. Expecting there to be some comment about her hair, she said "Yes, I really have pink hair."

"I noticed," the girl commented, not unkindly, "You're related to Flinkys, aren't you? A Wrackspurt's an invisible flying creature that floats through your ears and make your brain go fuzzy, by the way. You're new, right? I'm Luna."

"Ano… yes?" Sakura said confusedly. She wasn't used to hearing so much in English at a time.

Luna pointed behind her. "I think that house elf wants you." She said pointedly.

A skinny looking gray house elf stared up at her with big, bulgy eyes. "Winky was told Miss must see Master Flitwick, miss." Winky hiccupped, staring unblinkingly at Sakura.

"O-Ok…" Sakura stuttered, panicking. She was in trouble again??

Winky trotted out of the Ravenclaw Common Room, Sakura right behind her. Soon, they reached the corridor of the Charms classroom. "Excuse me… Professor?"

Flitwick looked up from his papers. He looked very serious, but it was rather detracted from by the fact that he was sitting on a huge mound of colorful pillows. "Sakura, there's something I need to tell you…"

* * *

Sasuke was _extremely_ annoyed by the time he reached the Slytherin Common Room. Half of Hogwarts (mainly the male population) shot dirty looks at him every 5 minutes. The other (girl) half followed him around everywhere like lost (annoying, whining) puppies, even to the bathrooms (although he kicked them out). 

It wasn't _his_ fault he was so sexy, right?

Then, as he walked through the dim green light, a smirking pale boy with two bulky boys behind him approached Sasuke.

"So, you're the foreigner."

Sasuke just strode right past the 3 Slytherins, without giving them so much as a passing glance.

"Hey- HEY! Wait a second-wait, you bastard! Don't ignore me! I'm a prefect!" Malfoy shouted, sounding very Percy-like.

Suddenly, the sound of hard, heeled shoes striking cold, stone floor echoed through the Common Room. A tall, greasy-haired, black robed man stepped into the Slytherin Common Room. It was Snape.

"I need one Sasuke Uchiha _immediately._" Snape said sharply.

Sasuke turned around, with a cold glare to match the Professor's. He slowly went to Snape, and they walked out together, Sasuke discreetly trying to edge away from him.

"Sasuke, Professor Dumbledore wishes me to tell you..."

* * *

"The Sorting Hat has disappeared."

* * *

A/N: So, another chapter done! It's not my favorite... but I hope you liked it! 

What will happen to the trios? Where did Kakashi go? Does Snape wash his underwear? Why am I asking these questions?

I promise the next chapter is on its way!

-Sea

* * *


	3. The Plot Advances

* * *

Disclaimer: Alas, but I do not own the wonderful manga/anime which is Naruto, or the wonderful book series which is Harry Potter.

And, for future reference, whenever the Konoha trio is speaking with each other, it's in Japanese.

Also, PLEASE, tell me when characters are OOC, like Naruto (although I do think I did a pretty OK job on him)

* * *

Chapter 3-

* * *

"Hatake-san?"

An old, but tall and wise-looking, white and long bearded man strode into the Defense Against the Dark Arts room.

"Yo." Kakashi appeared behind him in a puff of smoke.

"Excuse me, Kakashi. But, we seem to have a sort of dilemma. The Sorting Hat, as you know, is an old and very valuable item." Dumbledore said quietly, his words as wispy as the wind. "We need your students to help find the Hat. I have already asked Hagrid to search the Grounds. We must find it as soon as possible; for I fear Dark Magic is involved in this."

Kakashi's one visible eye crinkled ever so slightly in worry. "Don't worry, Dumbledore-sama. My students and I will keep extreme watch." He said calmly.

The headmaster nodded ever so slightly. "I will also contact your employer, and raise the rank of your mission. I fear this will not be easy…"

* * *

"Oi, Sasuke!" 

"Dobe, it's six in the morning."

"Ne, ne, do you want to peek in the woman's showers?"

BOINK.

"What was that for? I said woman's, didn't I?"

"…Hn."

It was 6 o'clock in the morning in the Slytherin Boy's dormitory. The eerie green light from the lake cast shimmering green light on the faces of the two boys.

"Come on, teme! Let's go wake up Sakura-chan!" Naruto shouted gleefully.

* * *

Sakura was sitting in the Ravenclaw Common Room at a small round desk made especially for studying students. She had woken up an hour ago, and was currently pouring a book someone had lent her, A History of Magic. 

"This book has so much more material than that handbook…"she muttered absentmindedly. "It's really interesting,"

* * *

"WHY WON'T THIS STUPID DOOR OPEN?!?!?!" Naruto screamed. 

Both Sasuke and Naruto had been trying to wrench open the old door to the Ravenclaw Common Room for very long half an hour, after they couldn't answer the question, "What comes first, the wizard or the witch?"

"Dobe, how should I know?" Sasuke snapped irritably, after trying a third Chidori on the stubborn bird door handle.

How strong could one old wooden door be?

Apparently, _very_ strong.

"I think you're opening it the wrong way." A feminine voice commented cheerfully.

Both boys turned around quickly. A pale, drifting girl was gazing at them thoughtfully.

"You must be Sasuke and Naruto." The girl continued, oblivious to Naruto's crazed look and Sasuke's famous 'extremely-pissed-off-so-don't-mess-with-me' glare. "My name is Luna; I'm in your friend's house. Aren't you supposed to be in other houses? I can get in Sakura for you, if you like."

Sasuke just glared at the unmoved, slightly smiling girl. Naruto was twitching impatiently, making little jerks every so often.

"Alright, then!" Luna said cheerily. She answered the question quickly, and walked inside the Common Room, the wooden door closing behind her into the two shinobi's faces.

Sakura walked out of the Ravenclaw Common Room, rubbing her eyes tiredly while holding her book underneath her arm.

"Ohayo, Sakura-chan!" Naruto said happily, showing no trace of his previous annoyance with the wooden door.

"Good morning Naruto, Sasuke-kun!" she said, yawning slightly. "What do you want? Did Kakashi-sensei need us?"

Naruto shook his head. "But that's a good idea," he said, "you know, because of the Sor-"

Sasuke's hand clapped against his mouth with a loud _smack_. "Dobe, we're supposed to keep quiet about that," he hissed.

"Keep quiet about what?"

A fiercely red-haired girl with freckles dotting her cheeks stood in front of them, behind her a foot quickly withdrawing into thin air.

"Ginny, get back here!" a voice hollered out of nowhere.

"_Shut up, Ron!"_ another voice hissed.

"It doesn't really matter, since she already ran out from under the cloak."

"OK, would someone explain what's going on?" Sakura asked confusedly. "Where are those voices coming from?"

The girl named Ginny sighed melodramatically. "Sorry, that's my brother Ron and my friend Hermione. I guess it's no use hiding that. But what are you supposed to keep quiet about?" she asked.

"Well-" Naruto started, but this time Sakura slapped her hand over his mouth.

"Didn't you hear Sasuke-kun? Don't say anything! Tsunade-shishou and Kakashi-sensei, along with Dumbledore-sama, will kill us!" she shushed.

"But Sakura-chan, she's _pretty_!"

"Seriously, you're as bad as Jiraiya-sama!"

* * *

The forest echoed with the sounds of many different creatures. Howls and cracks like thunder could be heard deep in the Forbidden Forest. Two strangers were there, standing hidden by the huge trees. They watched the castle with the utmost attention, their black cloaks, speckled with red clouds, swaying in the wind. 

One had dark hair, smoothed into a ponytail, his eyes a dark red with 3 comma shaped spots surrounding his pupil. The other looked remarkably like a turquoise shark, complete with 'gills', in the form of slits on his cheeks. He grinned with sharp teeth, his small pupils sparkling maliciously.

"Itachi," Kisame said, "when do we ditch that Orochimaru twin? I want to get that Jinchuuriki!"

"Silence, Kisame. We must wait longer…" Itachi said calmly.

"_I shall see you soon, little brother…"_ he thought, smirking cruelly.

* * *

In Konoha- 

Tsunade slammed her fist down on her desk, causing the small crack on it to inch forward another couple of centimeters. "Hyuuga Neji, Arai TenTen, Rock Lee and Gai! You are to report to Hogwarts in Igirisu (England), and assist Team Kakashi with their mission, along with finding the school's lost possession, Sorting Hat. This is an A-rank mission; avoid casualties at any cost!" she shouted with force.

"Hay!" cried Gai, "we shall help my eternal rival Kakashi and increase the power of youth!"

"Gai-sensei! You are such a great source of inspiration!" Lee cried, tear streaming from his eyes. "I will help you attain greater youth!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

Neji, TenTen, and Tsunade all sweat dropped. "Mou, why do they always do that?" TenTen complained.

"Just ignore them." Neji said.

"Anyway," Tsunade continued, "You will leave in 3 hours. Pack only things necessary, and Team Kakashi will have all the foreign items. Go!"

* * *

A/N: Hope you liked it! I updated faster this time… thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate your comments! BTW, Ginny is probably extremely OOC. What do you think of NaruGinny? Also, who do you want to appear in the next chapter? 

Please R&R! -Sea

* * *


	4. Here Comes the Green

When Trios Collide Chapter 4

A/N: Ack, I'm so sorry! I haven't updated in such a long time! I've been really busy with school, and inspiration hasn't come to me. Bear with me here!

BTW, the weirdest thing happened to me today. Last night, I was reading a SasuSaku fic for 2 hours, and a really long and good one too. Then, I had a NaruSaku dream, which was also really good! That is really weird… especially since I had the same dream but with Harry Potter characters. Strange, huh?

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or Naruto. This is a fan-made production and in no way associated with it in any way.

This has been brought to you by me, the author, and my friend EMILY! Editor, moral support, idea suggestor and chocolate supplier!! Make sure to say thank you in your reviews. Or else!

* * *

The Great Hall was filled with the hearty smell of spiced sausages and fried eggs as the steady hum of chatter rose from the 4 tables. All of the students were enthusiastically making new friends or seeing old ones, all of the houses mixing together. The sky shone through the ceiling, revealing the overcast sky with patches of sunlight. The Konoha trio was seated together at the Gryffindor table near Harry, Ron, and Hermione, despite what they had been told the previous day. They were wearing their new cloaks, although the ninjas had added their personal features: kunai pockets, medical supplies (for Sakura) and in Naruto's case, orange lining. Although Sasuke, being the looker he is, was occasionally visited by fan girls trying to give him things; from chocolates to a small, mud-colored toad, they were mostly left alone.

Sakura was busy scolding Naruto as Sasuke ate his ninja food. "Nice job, Naruto," Sakura said sarcastically, her eyebrows arched in annoyance, "Now we can't report to Kakashi-sensei until we go to class!"

Naruto scooted away from the furious pastel pink kunoichi. "Ne, Sakura, you don't have to be jealous!"

"JEALOUS?!"

* * *

A bright red-haired 6th year leaned over towards his two friends on the other side of the polished wood table. "Those three are definitely are a _little_ out of it." He whispered, looking darkly at the fuming girl and one quivering, apologizing mess along with a quiet, stoic chick-magnet with a chicken hairdo.

Currently, Sakura was yelling her head off at Naruto, Sasuke was watching them amusedly, and Naruto was scooting away from the fiery tempered girl.

"BAKA!" the fiery tempered girl yelled over and over again.

The three Gryffindors stared at the Japanese ninjas as Naruto was punished- Sakura-style.

"What are they saying?" Harry wondered aloud.

Both boys looked at Hermione.

"How am I supposed to know?" she said irritably, poking at her fried eggs.

"Come on!" Ron said, "You're a genius, twice as smart- no, ten times, and you know practically everything, you're probably smarter than my dad! Even Dumbledore says so!"

Hermione blushed slightly before quickly saying "So, what are our schedules?"

* * *

The Great Hall shuddered, and the huge wooden doors slowly creaked open. Two shadows trudged inside, one after the other. Two more leaped in ahead of the other two.

It was… the most disturbing sight in the world. No one could look at it without a double-take and a stare. The hideous outfits were a definite violation of the Fashion Police. It was…GREEN SPANDEX!

"Yoshi! Team Gai, we have reached our destination!"

Everyone in the Great Hall blinked. It was completely silent, shocked glares coming from McGonagall, and pleasant smiles from Dumbledore. Kakashi was too busy reading _Icha Icha_ Paradise to notice.

"Eternal rival, Kakashi! We meet again!" boomed Gai, "What challenging youthful competition will we go through today?!"

Tenten sweat dropped. "The last one they had was _jan, ken, pon_ (rock paper scissors)! Mou…" she muttered, "How did I ever get stuck with such a strange team…"

Meanwhile, Kakashi was reading his… literature, and did not give even the slightest impression he had heard the man with a green spandex body suit.

Gai had just noticed the student body staring at him. "Ah! Schools are so wonderful! They are an explosion of youth, contained in single place!"

"You're such an inspiration, Gai-sensei!"

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

Behind them the sunset shined and the waves crashed as they hugged.

Neji and Tenten sweat dropped. "How do they do that…?"

* * *

While all of this was happening, Team 7 was in a stunned silence. Why… why in the world was _GAI and LEE_ in the school?!

Sakura's eyebrows were twitching. "This…this is going to make it a little hard to convince Potter-san we're his friends…"

"A LITTLE? THEY'LL RUIN IT! I'LL FINISH THIS MISSION ALL MYSELF! BELIEVE IT!" Naruto shouted.

Sasuke glared at Naruto darkly. "Baka…" he muttered.

"Naruto-kun! Sakura-chan! I didn't see you!" Lee shouted.

Sakura squeaked. "Hide me!" and ducked under the table.

* * *

The dark and murky Potions room was filled with steams and fogs from the many potions being brewed. The sallow Potions master stood in front of the Gryffindors and Slytherins.

"Silence!" he shouted scornfully. "No doubt you believe today's, rather _interesting,_ visitors are a cause for excitement. _However,_ Mr. Weasley, that does not mean you can talk during my class! Today I have-"

CRASH

A luminescent man covered in sticky, green oozing slime was getting up from the shattered remains of Snape's jars of unidentifiable things. Grinning brightly, he did the good guy pose and said "I promise to bring Sasuke back! That is a promise of a _youthful _lifetime!"

Sasuke hit his head repeatedly on the desk.

Naruto was choking up, either with laughter or embarrassment for Gai.

Meanwhile, the sallow man was watching unamusedly, while Gai flashed his teeth at everyone in the room.

"Enough of this! Who are you?!" Snape asked coldly.

"I am the youthful teacher of all things youthful! I am even more youthful than a baby! I am MIGHT GAI!" Gai proclaimed, flashing his teeth brightly at Snape.

Lee leaped in, sobbing. "GAI-SENSEI! I'm sorry I failed you! Copying Naruto's promise does not make you more youthful! FORGIVE ME!"

"Lee, do not break down! We can restore our youthfulness with a group hug!"

And thus, Snape was stuck in a group hug with Lee and Gai, getting some strange pus on him in the process.

"Let us leave now, Lee!"

"Hai, Gai-sensei!"

Lee and Gai leaped out of the room with fireworks and sparks of electricity.

* * *

A very amused class watched Snape slowly get up from the stone ground, covered in some excess slime from Gai. He looked dangerously at anyone who's mouth resembled a smile.

Sitting in the back near Naruto and Sasuke, the Gryffindor trio was cracking up.

"Reckon the other foreigners are pretty messed up, don't you think?" Ron whispered, hardly keeping in the laughter in his voice.

Harry grinned back. "Y-"

"POTTER, WEASLEY! Detention for both of you! In my office, 7pm tonight."

As the two looked up, Snape was right in front of them, glaring angrily at them.

* * *

Standing in the dull light of the morning sunshine, the new D.A.D.A. teacher picked up a thick, heavy book with a dusty denim blue cover. He flipped through the textbook Dumbledore had advised him to use. "Spells?" he muttered. "This won't help in the real world…"

He remembered the rivalry of the houses.

He was going to teach them Inter-house cooperation if it killed them.

(A/N: I didn't write the last line. That was from Harry Potter Crack Ficlets, Asuma Kureru. Hilarious story! Check it out.)

* * *

Sakura, Naruto, and Sasuke ran for their lives. One of Sasuke's fangirls had just informed them that the Defense Against the Dark Arts class started 5 minutes earlier than usual.

"Come ON! We can't be late for Kakashi-sensei's class!" Sakura shouted between breaths.

They raced up the stairs and through a corridor, crashing through students flying through the air, and dived into the D.A.D.A. classroom.

Kakashi looked up from his book, his mask covering what was probably a smirk. "I see you fell for my trick-"

"LIAR!" Sakura and Naruto yelled, interrupting him.

Kakashi sweat dropped. "Anyway," he continued, "I need you to work on your genjutsu, taijutsu, and ninjutsu, and patrol during your free time on the Grounds. Don't worry about finishing your homework or studying- you don't want to be wizards anyway."

"We can still do it though, right?" Sakura asked hopefully.

She was the only one in Konoha- possibly in the world, too- who _enjoyed_ homework.

Naruto cocked his head. "Sakura-chan, why do you want to work? It's not like you enjoy it or anything." He commented.

All of them sweat dropped. Naruto was so dense sometimes.

* * *

The silver-haired jounin surveyed his class. Nervous looking students stared back at him, most likely a little scared at the evil smile that he _definitely_ had under his mask. Kakashi hadn't taken off his jounin uniform and Konoha headband, so he probably looked something like an army sergeant to the Slytherins and Gryffindors.

"My name is Ha- Professor Hatake." He said suddenly, stuttering with a slight accent that otherwise didn't reveal his ethnicity.

"What's that you have there?" a boy with mousy brown hair ask suddenly.

Kakashi was holding two small bells dangling on small white threads of string. He grinned, his smile hidden behind his mask.

"Get into groups of three, with at least one person in a different house as you are. Make sure there are at least one girl and one boy in your team."

The sound of shuffling people and chairs being pushed in was heard.

"Now, as- you, what's your name?" Kakashi said, nodding toward the boy who spoke up earlier.

"Naru- Ano, I mean, um, ROBERT!" the boy said confusedly.

The Konoha ninja did a double-take. "NARUTO!" he yelled.

* * *

The dark, dead branches of the trees around the trio waved ominously toward them, looking like clawed arms trying to slash them. Naruto was being quiet for once in his life, trailing behind Sasuke. The Uchiha prodigy looked bored, crossing his arms and staring straight ahead.

Sakura seemed terrified, jumping at every sound and nervously keeping a hand focused with chakra.

"What are you so afraid of?" Sasuke asked flatly, after Sakura jumped when an owl hooted.

"Come on, Sasuke-kun… di-didn't you read the part in the handbook describing all the beasts and creatures here?" she said, trying not to stutter.

Inner Sakura laughed. _Yeah, like I'd be scared of a unicorn!_

"Hn."

* * *

Meanwhile, the older brother of the silent Sasuke watched stealthily above in a large tree that was now currently devoid of any animal life.

He frowned. "The jinchuuriki- it's fake. Just a copy of my _little_ brother."

* * *

Sakura sniffed, her senses more acute than usual because of her fear. "Is that… fresh sushi?"

* * *

A/N: Thanks for reading! I was going to add two more 'events' but I figured here was a good place to stop. I mean, this has to have some plot, right? About the delay… sorry… don't blame me, it's the homework's fault! Don't hurt me! hides under a pillow

The next chapter will be coming soon! Please, please review! The more I get, the more I will write and the sooner I will update!

Please review!!

-Sea 3

* * *


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